A manifesto of Aggregation

Introductory Article

Whenever bonds of ignorance cover both eye and ear of public majority, the inquisitive nature will leave their hearts for blind and deaf acceptance; the will to ignore is such that any voice countering convention is rendered, in the mind, equal to a psychopath preaching murder, when truly he preaches love. The digression from truth has gotten now so dire; the truth tellers are sequestered beyond notice, and the propagandists herd the mass-mind farther from its needs, and closer to their desires.
During such times, a comparative few ponder the totality of this diseased structure, seeking to prune the rotten branches and bring vitality back to the lifeblood. Such a few are usually doubted by many, accepted by few, and understood by yet fewer. Still though, they stand beside the flow of reigned impetus to be called a liar by the many they struggle to liberate.
I wrote the following out of necessity and coincidence, not from the start intending to issue such a lengthy introspection. However, eventually the volume of information that fell from my mind and onto the page compelled me to draw out more, until most, if not every piece, was exposed.
Every piece is original, and because truth is truth, some may see similarities in what I say with philosophies, religions, or whatever else. I cannot stress this enough though, what I profess is not philosophy or religion, but rather, observation. A philosopher thinks about things, it is a mind approach; my approach is the very opposite of philosophizing. It is not thinking about things, but seeing with a clarity that comes when one puts their mind aside.

With all that said, I do not claim to know everything, but I do not believe that those institutions, which have been followed for so long, have that claim either. I do believe however, that because these ideas are out of the box, out of the realm of mind, and therefore not biased whatsoever, that the wisdoms herein are to be taken seriously.
Some of the language is poetic in nature, and some scientific; I have left it to the reader to interpret when those instances occur, but it is important to know that some phrases have more than one meaning. I would suggest reading each item more than once for clarity. This is to be read many times over ones life; live and with time you will come to realize, if you have not already, the realities behind the words.






The Content of this Consciousness:

Wisdoms

by Matthew P. Holbert




Each stanza stands on its own, like a separate quote, but –like people— it sometimes goes in a vein of generally similar ideas. I hope this content helps to liberate the many from ego focus, and the few from overzealous pursuits, to find “a season in your self” and a festive heart for life’s moment.


I propose that the ultimate cause of the world’s problems is mental superficiality caused by ego focus, rather than a sensible degree of conscious-attention to reality.


Ego vs. Conscious

The ego, in the conventional sense, is a word meaning either self-love (egocentric), or a superficial layer to the Freudian mind. To me however, these interpretations miss the nature of the word ego, which really means I. What is ego if not a character and self concept? I is the history of ones life, conjoined in the present moment as a character. If one explores their existence, they see all as one: life is the history, the moment, and I.

Every incoming stimulus, turned into information, derived from culture, experiences, perceptions, impressions, emotions, and thoughts, collectively aggregate and represent words like I, me, mind, or ego. The self-concept that we wrongly consider to be personality itself is organized, and made clear by the moment and the memory in tandem, to create what we call “right now”. Constantly reminded, and remembering these pieces of perception, one is in a perpetual state of ego. When ones mind is ignored however, forgotten, there is an opening of something else.

Consciousness is that something else which flowers in a state of mindlessness. When one loses those thoughts, which are so endlessly derived and compiled, ones mind is at peace. For mind is a constant struggle to the top where there is no top; one cannot know all, but with awareness, one can observe the mountain, and one can also leave that mountain and go elsewhere.

When I have observed the mountain, and I have gone elsewhere and learned the order of the world around me, I am at peace. When I have come to accept that no matter where I go, and far I get from myself, I still exist somewhere, I am at peace. Only when I die will the mountain leave me, or I will leave the realm of mountains.

My mind creates this world around me; it forms stimuli into intelligence so that I can recognize familiar objects and symbols. My mind is also created by the culture. My self-concept therefore is a relationship between my mind creating my world, and my culture creating my mind. In actuality, an independent thought cannot come about unless it is derived from awareness or pure consciousness, outside of exterior influences.

You are the world, and the world is you; change you, change the world. Disassociate from the events of ego and realize the big picture of consciousness!

Consciousness and mind coexist. Like a song, the silence between the notes is consciousness, and like the wax and wane of a tide, conscious awareness will come in and out, but will not constantly flow like a river. Clarity of thought is thus derived: from a relatively constant state of mindless awareness, or N-one existence made aware.

Consciousness and ego are elements, two currents influencing each other. When one is focused upon, the other dies down, when the two of them are attended to equally, the whole river thrives.

Instead of letting a mind-state dictate the course of thought, one lets consciousness observe, and from that observation, thought turns unified and dynamic. With less and less limitation, this process can lead to spontaneous creative thinking, derived from the source of personality rather than the content of the mind.

The mind is a superficial layer to the personality. Personality is the essence of being a person. Our personality is layered, like an egg there is a protective shell made by the persona, reinforced by the thin film called ego. However, the vast majority of our personality is in the sub and unconscious. Like an open wound in the core (which is the true self—pure consciousness—the yoke of personality) these repressed, forgotten, or habitually ignored aspects of our selves are what make our actions sadistic, our desires perverting, and our thoughts superficial. It is when we accept, and choose active awareness of these aspects, that we can dissolve them, and with them our perversions.

Without ego there is no personality as such. When one is without ego, one is out of harmony—as a human—with the duality of physical/finite vs. metaphysical reality. Consciousness is a link, a touchstone to experience; Ego is the experience. We are the world, and the world is us. One should not strive to get rid of their ego and go into the mountains, seeking clarity and pure consciousness, unless they have chosen this path of their own desire; that is a journey to behold, as is the opposite: a life junky. Both are necessary poles, which should be respected, but not idealized. The ideal is to be in harmony with both ends: to be intelligent and clear minded, conscious and carefree. To strengthen your mind with content and informations, and at the same time to have deep awareness at any moment. Too often we become one sided, but it is when harmony is achieved that we actualize the beauty of life’s potential. This is what the old sages called the trinity. Understanding duality is fine, but to have the third component (harmony) is to be one with gods will.

Consciousness is the essence of pure love. “Love” is conventionally used in the sense of mutual partnership and reciprocation of affections towards another person; actions of passion and pleasure are the common concept of love. However the love of consciousness is like the love of a mother for twin children; the love of consciousness is the vision of god, where everything is equal and good in opposition. Evil does not exist unless it exists in you. Beauty does not exist, unless it exists in you. Both poles help to measure each other; degrees of severity are necessary for comparative beauty, and difficulty. If all where the same, there would be nothing delightful. When there is no more beauty, there is complete ego.

Self-consciousness, as conventionally conceived, is ego reflection, and the cause of inhibition. Patrick is worried about what they think of Patrick. In a state of true consciousness, one has no such worry, and is only aware of such a perspective.

Consciousness cannot be built; it can only be made more aware of; I believe this to be the act of no action that the ancient sages spoke of.

In order to keep self-continuity, the mind protects itself from penetration. This is the cause of superficiality. The so-called “soul” of western religion is another example of this self-continuity. The soul of most religions is depicted as you, I, the mind, with a new body; a comforting and wonderful idea, but one which ensures the continuity of ego beyond death. Ego is made of perceptions, accumulated stimulus, and derives from the elements of a physical realm. When we say that the ego is the soul, we are saying that mind is god, and therefore that we are god. Only when we say that god is consciousness do we admit that “I” will be left behind when this body dies, and that the true self will continue forever. It is only hard to deal with because we are so attached to our selves, but just like trinkets and money, we cannot take with us physical things when we die. Our thoughts and mind are of that physical realm. But don’t worry, the finite brain hinders consciousness, so when you die, conscious awareness is made relatively infinite.

When I state that I am angry, the phrase means exactly what it says: anger dose not derive from that which is perceived as angering, but rather derives from the self, the mind; from ego anger swells, not from they, or you, or it that I say I’m angry at. Anger does not come from the external perceptions; it dwells in you, it cannot be acquired. Mindfulness is the origin of anger; consciousness is not an automatic cure to this inner daemon, but it can be a damper on the flames.

When the mind is empty and everything has equal adoration; there must be pure consciousness. When the fear of death ends, and sorrow becomes a measure of beauty; truth and god must be. This is when true love can begin, but only if the one aware is able to see himself as he would a flower: a finite thing, in fact dead to the whole world, and yet full of vibrant life, in joyous and perfectly fleeting beauty. Such beauty is most high. Such beauty is gods’ grace embodied.

The ego, in all of its apparatus, is like a wall of stimulus to which I have been suited; arms thrust into its murky essence, body stretched down into its depths, thoughts emanating like ripples behind and from the wall. The relationship of ego and consciousness therefore, is like two mirrors whose nature is to reflect each other—consciousness being the observer of ego and reality, and ego being the participating force that allows life and awareness to exist, and generates the desire for the continuity of that pairing.

Your sense of presence is a reflection of this relationship. Every moment that you are alive, every coherent moment that you spend behaving, acting, and reacting to stimulus, you are in a state of ego-participation—it’s like watching TV or playing a videogame: you are interacting with a system of stimulus. However, when the mirrors are able to face, and reflect upon each other rather than have a person, a body, a concern in between them, infinity and the rest of reality can be realized. This is called ego-observation. One can be in both states at the same time, but it is difficult.

Because of my experiences, there is an emotional distraction. There are never intentionally malicious people, there are only the neglectfully ignorant; I have previously been distracted by my own impressions, and so thought whatever of whomever. There are no ugly people, but in my heart; there are people worth spending time with, if only in truth. For there is neutrality in us all, and yet a sway of aggravation that emotions, created by moment-to-moment impressions and experiences, bring. The neutrality that I speak of is our personal trials and tribulations. No one is intentionally malicious; they’re always in a spin. A person is to be pitied, not punished for their impetus.

In reality, there is no direct interference or interaction between consciousness and ego. Ego can only learn from the conscious state; it can only be influenced by the state of consciousness and metacognition; consciousness cannot have control over the behaviors of the physical ego, it is a passive observer. Ego and consciousness are too vastly incongruent to be unified in the current body system (one being of the tangible, molecular and atomic state of reality, and the other being of the quantum, metaphysical [meta for behind] reality). They can however be complementing forces, if used in tandem—the yin yang symbol comes to mind.

Therefore, “I” is not important when death comes. I, ego, is not important in death, but I is very important in life. Life is the time of the physical in the existence of existence. After life, I will not exist in its divisive form. I will be They. Unified, the supreme consciousness is aware of reality through the experiences of all beings. Therefore, what kind of unified consciousness are we proliferating? Life is, by its nature, a time to rejoice in festive communion, and a time to experience complete silence; these things cannot be felt if we do not. And further, using creativity and understanding the nature of our collective evolution, we shall progress into ever-greater standards of life.

I is experience. Experience is gods’ reflection; we are the mirrors to reality—whatever is inside of us is important, if only to existence—for there to be an ear for the falling tree in the forest to be heard and appreciated. Our constructed minds are made of pictured events, scenes, and stages—and our bodies are all three. Further, the mind paid attention to as an event, as well as the body—in the present moment—is both an experience and an awareness which goes beyond the parameters of the self, the persona, and the ‘I’ as now-experience, for the man in prison cannot see his cell from the outside unless he escapes it.

The Egyptian sarcophagus seems to make this message clear; a dead body rests behind a golden surface of ornate and beautiful matter—what was in him is shown on the outside; the soul rises from darkness to inhabit this shell of ego once again. When I look in the mirror, the irony that I am a mirror looking into a mirror is not lost, if only my eyes could see beyond that face between the mirror and the truth.

A single sentence is ego expressed.

Our language has been structured by ego, but originates in consciousness. Consciousness is the witness to experience; ego is the experience itself, and the consequential intelligence developed, and stored in the brain. Therefore, whatever our collective state of awareness determines the words and structure we use in language. When one speaks in first person (I am), they are talking from the perspective of ego; when one speaks in third person (I is), they are speaking in the perspective of consciousness. However, it is not necessary to speak in such a way, it is only necessary to realize, and perceive this difference in practice.

Our sentences are egoic expressions of naming-states. I –feel-hungry means: I am (the state of) feeling-hungry. The name “feeling-hungry” is derived from the stimulus expressed as the moment in simple terms: the name is “now”. That moment that is expressed, due to an observer and intelligence, is my present state of being, therefore it is me that is expressed. Language therefore, is a mechanism of the mind, not consciousness; one can experience events without language to describe them. Our ability to use language effectively is a function of consciousness and mind together. Consciousness is viewing or reading the mind, and the mind is thinking or speaking the words.

Not unlike the language system of the Original Americans, these name states are expressions of self, like a sentence is made of consecutive snapshots of the moment. I am lightningbear is not unlike the sentence, “I am awake.” Names are a general expression of experience; sentences are fragments, a layer of the building ego. Sentences like “wow!” are the same in that way.

Words, think on that structure; languages too, observe them, think of their application in relation to ones state of being.

I have never been should be: I has never been. Third person is the correct tense because “I” is a physical, finite entity stored in the brain, which is separate from consciousness. Sentences should reflect awareness. My-sentences should show You-minds the nature of such structure.

Another way of looking at language is: I feel means I feels. When one is conscious, and observing the ego and language, one may see that I (ego) is an avatar, a separate being, an object in the sentence, observed by a peripheral perspective. I feel good makes less syntactical sense therefore, than I feels good, or I is feeling good. Ego, in this sense, is not the expresser. Rather, ego is being observed. The words are spoken from the different perspective, because the experiences are instead seen from the hidden consciousness; the realization of Oneness comes from that perspective.

When one speaks in the egocentric perspective, one innately sounds barbaric, as one should.

Life, in the moment-to-moment, is a conversation, a structure, a scene.

Laughter, true laughter, comes from the Observer of Oneness.

Impressions are more actual than the words that attempt to describe them. Symbols are structural, and that structure is made by the mind, not consciousness. My impressions of the physical world—which is equally structural—are more real than the so-called objective, or superficial experience: so, the deeper, the realer. Think of this when in conversation with someone—obviously—sexually interested in you but doesn’t want to say it upfront; what is more true, the conversation, or your impressions and your unstructured observations of what is going on? Here, objective reality is the failure, because someone observing from afar doesn’t perceive the truth that the one experiencing does.

Ones Complexity

My body is made of cells, my experiences are made of moments, and both are ever changing; the society is made of people, and the culture is made of many societies, and both are ever changing; entire nations make up the world, and continents too, everything is ever changing, and our solar system is made of planets and a star, and the galaxy is made of all those stars and invisible planets, and the known universe is made of those galaxies, and who knows what’s outside of this spherical galaxy system that we call the universe. When we realize the nature and the patterns of reality, we can begin to go with the will of that evident pattern. Make technology based off of the most efficient thing we can think of—the human body, or the cell. Make technology that is similar to nature. View the world, and our selves, our government, technology, everything, as we would cells, because that is the most fundamental form of life. Every One builds up to a greater, more complex One, and everyone must see that; that we have been unconsciously developing our world in this way already. Don’t cars seem like cells driving down the road, and doesn’t the road look like a vein? Look at a map; you will quickly notice that it seems more like anatomy than the surface of a planet. Think in terms of world as a body and we will advance beyond all previous ventures.

The human body, as well as all things in nature, has a layered body. Ones metaphysical being is layered equally complex as the physical body, but perceived as much less simple, and the effects of spiritual incongruence are felt much less than hunger, sadness, or addiction, or even deformity. The effects are in the concept, and the manifest ambiance of created situations. The mind is a structure much like the human body: you use it and appreciate it, or you ignore it and perish. This is why I call the mind-body a fruit of possible creativity, like a sugar of rich minds, tasted by the gods. The individual must be thought of in such terms, and cultivated with as much verve as a prize-winning pumpkin.

All things are iterations of the fundamental: aspects of the atom are in a human, but in a holistic, and therefore different way.

We do create our moments. From our personality all things are derived. The cultures, and all other directing systems, are like a gully to which the souls of people, like droplets of rain on a leaf, flow into the emptiness.

Simplification is when you try and turn the complex into a stereotype, or a label: Scorpio, American, Catholic, Witch, Satanist, freemason, enlightened, Patrick, George, Teacher, and Woman versus Man, and from that stereotype, you limit the potential, and true complexity of any thing, person, etc. My question is, do we not all exist in this place? There will always be greed and sorrow, the beauty of intelligence is the ability to prune the rotten branches, and to do it enough to secure a prime amount of nutrient, letting all wastes like fall leaves become compost for new generations to grow out of. This act of simplification must end; the true complexity of the world must be appreciated.


The old ways time has ended. The new beginning is, at all-times, within possibility; all moments are this way too, through the beautiful power of the brain. The ways of the world have been previously egocentric, and through enlightenment, we have the chance to change the world’s problems; by renouncing the mind we can understand the conscious, and through consciousness we have unification; in this way we become the spiritually holy, and bring the world into a new way.

The old question has been for too long: “How can we have security?” We are not ready to solve the world’s problems because of this mindset. The old question is inherently breaking the possibility of to-morrows prosperity. Change is required to make this world into a heaven; there must be complete paradigm shifts soon, because the world’s way is opposing the right. Security is not what we need, we need change; we need the opposite of security in order for us to get what we really want, which is high standards of living for as many people as possible. But if the fear of instability is too strong, the world’s way will soon rise to be hellish and enslaving forever. A side effect of change is instability. So the fear must die in us all, change must come. The fear of evolution, the fear of complete change, the fear of death, and the fear of instability must end and end forever. Only out of instability, only in a state of constant change will paradise be possible.

Throughout my life, I have had conflicting ideations; these are: there is a meaning to every moment, or there is no meaning to existence. With either idea, there are inherent implications; I will go through them consecutively: if there is meaning to every moment, I am either worthy or unworthy of life, or whatever I do is sacred, and if there is no meaning to anything then there is no need to ponder my actions, no need to understand my world—no need, but still a compulsion perhaps.

My understanding thus far is that all actions are equal opposites: everything is its own, variety is complex, and complexity is an aspect of infinity. So everything that I do is influencing the further complication of the material universe, thus increasing the duality between infinite nothing and infinite something.

To be in tune is to appreciate life. Simply, there is no life without ego, just as there is no life without consciousness. Personality is a flower to be cultivated, nurtured, and grown into sweet ripeness, with carelessness and determination. Education, learning, these are the nutrients of the minds growth. Ones brain must be the strongest organ. Diet would greatly contribute to this. Utilizing natural foods only makes the body strong; this is vital.

Furthermore, starting education at the youngest age possible would increase the productivity, creativity, and overall intelligence of the human brain. Along with the age factor, children educated by child psychologists (professors of multiple fields: math, science/physics, psychology, sociology, fitness/diet etc.) would be by far more benefited and more intelligent in life. Thus capable of teaching youngsters in ways that are effective, educators should teach the same children for multiple years, building a relationship and learning strategies that the children can get used to. Get the smartest people to teach your youngsters, focus on early education, because that is when their minds are most open. Then, simply supply them with free information once they have the inherent desire to learn. Once learning stops being a bore, and is not an obligation, the mind is more inclined to study—what they have the desire to study and—vigorously.

There is no one true perspective, except for the one from the bottom up. If both the culmination at the bottom and the power of the top were to work in harmony, the whole pyramid would be glorified.

Due to the amount of entertainment, something has happened to the collective mind or world ego. In the past years of my life, people in the limelight have been cheered as gods, and gods they are in this generation. Generation YX had its heydays in the early nineties into early two thousand, but generation YP began when the Y2k debate began. Generation YP started with ridiculous fear, continued with fear with the attacks on the WTC’s, and continues with ridiculousness. Its egocentric focus being so intense, and that focus being primarily upon entertainments and entertainers, that perversion is the result without fail.




Isn’t it funny how our bodies know—with such intelligence—what to do, and how our brains are the same: acting independently, with such intelligence?

Close your eyes, and imagine imagining infinity. The Mandelbrot set, displayed in the duality of life: Constant separations.
And eventual returns to the original intent.
The structure is lost in its working.
But found again… As if by a memory through time: an instantaneous transmission.


Things will work themselves out eventually, if everyone goes with their emotions. Go with Ego, and with the utmost clarity and gut-like will: Go with intelligence, and consciousness. Use the duality. We things will work our selves out eventually. We machines will humanmathmatically figure out this silly world structure into a more efficient one that everyone can agree too. Never before have we had such an opportunity, but we can do it now. The whole worlds people can come together through Internet, and negotiate about what everyone can be settled on for a world union, to work as a single planet for a world cultivation of perfection for the benefit of the planet.

There must also be a new set of standards for child making: One per family for a thousand years. This would be a choice for all: either get a vasectomy and don’t have children, but chose to be with one person your whole life—to limit disease, and to develop a true companionship with another—or never get a vasectomy, have one child, and never have sex again after that one child. This standard will rather be a commandment, those who do not help with the healthy and happy decrease in population, will be pitied, not punished; those who take the path of greater difficulty will be glorified, and historically documented. Those who chose to not have children at all, and not have sex ever, will be exulted. The option, which has been adopted by the money trust, or world elite, has been extermination through war, disease, and famine. My plan is much less hostile, and one that is more than understandable to those whom see overpopulation as a future problem. Once again I will state that this is a choice, and one that is every spiritually religious persons’ to bear as a religions task, not an obligation or law set forth by me or anyone else, but rather by the higher force of nature. Our reproduction must be controlled by our intelligence; else it will be our destruction.

I propose that we teach our children, from the beginning of learning and intelligence, that a part of religious life is giving your true feelings to the sail, and with that as your wind, find your true soul mate—putting great importance upon the consideration of this search, and to make a life-long-companion with the first person you have sex with; the first person who you like the most, giving an amount of time for consideration on this matter. I suggest this idea as a facet to the world religion: a religion incorporating all of the standards of all the religions, and even increasing the standards thereof. There is such commonality in all religions that this is obviously possible to anyone knowledgeable in theology.

Improvements such as the common use of meditation would expose the rouses of the minds confusions. Also, the study of sages will be a basic standard, but not mandatory. To eat only what has been naturally cultivated and non-domesticated (eventually) and what is in planetary abundance, in moderation, thus allowing the world to flourish after years of overuse. We must learn moderation; even moderation in moderation, for this has been the principal downfall of all great things.

Everyone could be producing so much more, and with higher quality, Naturally! And naturally everything must be. Technology is a natural process and output of the human mind, but we must evolve a new process for more efficient and more productive output. This endeavor must be on the minds of every intelligent, spiritual, and concerned person on this planet. We the Earth, must evolve into a greater, and more prosperous union. Previously, our output has been toxic. If it is perhaps possible, we must make technologies with the standard of positive output rather than the destructive and poisonous effects our creation can have. We cannot allow compromise on this matter.


Religion Re-evolution: Reiteration

In scientology, there are assumptions that will contribute to the misunderstanding, or misinterpretation of how to understand selfhood, and conversely what should be called theta in scientology, but what is called thetan instead—indicating fragmentation where there is none (theta=unity/singularity, thetan=fragment). If theta has long been understood to represent consciousness—its symbol being a zero with a horizontal dash through it—then words like you, and I should not be used, as this would work towards the same self-preservation through an ego-soul as all other religions guarantee.

Theta, or consciousness, is not divided or fragmented. Rather, the ego, the “I”, and the mind are what seemingly divide or fragment the awareness of consciousness. The word thetan may as well be a new term describing the same ego. What are you? No what is you. You is a symbol for the accumulated physical data stored in the brain. Theta is the observer of this information.

Ego is the content of consciousness. Consciousness, as a field of electromagnetic energy, is attracted into fragmentation by the physical body, but is actually infinite and singular—like an octopus dipping its tentacles into jars of jam; my body is the jar, the jam is my experiences; as long as its tentacle is touching the jam, I is in focus; to take I out of focus is to remove the jam, from the jar of the mind, from consciousness. Ego is finite, but the N-oneness/noneness/no-thingness/nothingness of consciousness, which we can have awareness of, and have awareness because of, is infinite because it’s not body based and therefore is not fragmented. This is obvious when one ponders: what is the only thing, which is infinitely large and infinitely small, that can never be destroyed? Answer: No thing.

Nothing, the darkness of space, the absence; and in the absence of ego there is the same infinity; this infinity is an eventuality for the universe, as well as the human.

Behind the video screen, there is darkness, that darkness is watching the screen. That darkness is the equalizer of all beings, because that darkness for me is the same as anyone else. That darkness, that absence, which is observing the screen of experience, is theta. Therefore, I is not a thetan, I is I, theta is the aggregated soul of every one, the source of all observers.

I am made in gods’ likeness. My body, my mind, and my awareness are in gods’ likeness. What do I mean by this? I do not mean it in the conventional sense at all; I think my interpretation is far more beautiful in fact—even sacred. The conventional interpretation is that god looks like a human. This, in my opinion, is a great misinterpretation…one of many. To me, god is reality. Therefore, I am made in realities likeness. My body, my mind, and my awareness, are the iterated patterns of reality. The portrait of god is made of infinitely infinite strokes, each one resembling the big picture, and each one adding up to a bigger stroke.

When a religion requires artistic followers create nothing but praise for its god or itself, it becomes like communism and fascism, and art becomes propaganda.

Every tree is an altar to the structure of God; every leaf is a life unto the tree; when those leaves fall, the energy is plucked from them and back into the tree; it is continuously growing by external forces, more branches, more leaves, and more lives. Each tree is like a planet, living beings fit themselves into every facet of its structure, and the tree itself is alive. But trees die, so too must planets and whole universes. When all things have lost their action, life dies, and like a bug, the universe will be a hollow shell and lifeless dust. All things are altars to the structure of god: when you see a bird perched upon a tree, you are watching universes of matter interacting with each other, when you look at a galaxy, you are seeing a flower of the heavens, blooming into the darkness as massive, bright complexity. Our bodies are altars to the universe, but our consciousness is the iteration, in that sense, of gods’ awareness. Our bodies are iterations of the pattern of the physical; our consciousness is the essence of that structure. Experience the world around you with the perspective of no one, and you will see that a rose looks like a galaxy; you would pull off the bark of a tree and find life living off of both the death of the tree, and other lives as though that tree is the planet that these bugs live on, a whole planet with forests growing on its exterior, and layers leading into its inner core where its life circulates.

Every single thing is a stage and a scene, every scene is a stage, and every scene is made of many stages. All the worlds a stage, and every single thing is a world unto itself.

God is not an old man in the sky, judging; god is the air that my brainlung breathes. Ego is not a state of mind, but rather, ego is the phenomena called experience. In order to achieve true enlightenment, one must renounce ego and realize the truth of consciousness. Reality is infinite, God is infinite, and therefore God is Reality. In order to understand your relationship with god, you must learn the nature of reality, and therefore the nature and patterns of infinity; they are present in every aspect of personality: in both body and mind.

There is infinite mercy in Gods heart because he cannot hate what he has created, he can only love—in the sense that creativity is a means to beauty and beauty is a means to love. But death is not a means to hate, because death is not an opposite to life. Hate would be not being born. All possibilities must be created because god has infinite love, and yet, in a sad sense, infinite hate. Another-duality-that-makes-reality-possible. If all things existed at the same time, it would be nonsense. Things must lose their chance in order for others to exist; we are not chosen above those not born, we are those loved by god, loved and yet burdened with his love, for life is hard to lose attachment to; its hard to be free of.

Make no mistake, god sees no wrong in what we do, but we are his children, we are the ones new to this existence, and we must find out, by mandate of our divine heritage, what is good for everyone, and what is not good for everyone. There must be a complete reform of the world governments, and other institutions. We must see our place, where before we were so misguided. Heaven is here, and in the arms of god: a rest from all this chaos, in the eternal heart of the father.

When people say, “oh my god!” the essence of their exclamation means: oh, my reality, oh this reality. One usually utters the phrase because they are surprised by something, good or bad, to do with reality; it otherwise doesn’t make much sense. Therefore, I suggest that the phrase is derived, like so many arbitrary phrases, from a subconscious understanding of the true god.

The meaning of life, absent the subjective, egocentric human sentiment, is to increase god/reality/infinity in its complexity. God is the flowering of anything and everything. You should stop looking in books, stop looking through the eyes of others, and listen. To listen is to hear without a din of other perspectives clouding your own understanding. Be like a child and listen without any preconceived notions of what is. There must be a complete absence of knowledge for one to learn anything.

There is a great difference between something that is endless and something that is infinite. No thing, which we call tangible, can be endless; therefore, only nothing is endless. All things, which are conventionally called infinite, have a season of existence about them: beginning from something/s else, which from thereafter is perpetually altered until finally converted into a completely new event, and so on—every exit is an entrance so to speak, and everything infinite eventually dies and is reborn into novelty. Consider this, the universe is like a flower in relativity to nothing, existing for but a day, a passing hour amid a great, timeless darkness.

God is. God is not. God is the harmony, the singularity formed by conjoining opposing aspects of reality. God is reality, nature, the nature of reality and infinity. God does not end, only aspects of its existence wax and wane. When a relative dies, the family does not die with him.

When the wind dies, the air does not die with it, but when the air dies, no thing caries it.

If we want to discover our possibilities, we need only follow the principles of gods will. First we must search them. They are easy to find when one is looking. Instead however, we have been misled by systems, which unknowingly fail god. These systems preach separation instead of unification, and those that do proclaim unification are not good with the true god.


To understand one must renounce all knowledge. The content of your mind must be renounced. You must realize that “you” is not theta, or consciousness. Whatever “you” thinks it knows gets in the way of its listening, learning, and understanding. Understanding means to stand from the lowest foundation, getting to the basement, saying you know nothing. And from there, from that perspective of admitted ignorance, finding out independently what the truth is.

Creation is defined as something out of nothing. In conjunction, evolution is when that something changes. The ultimate transformation is source unification. All things die. Only nothing is infinite. Enlightenment is the renunciation of ego; self-actualization is when you have overcome, and learned to accept your self-concept. To see your life as a trinket, like a book; it is separate from the emptiness and ambivalence and omniscience of the conscious. Consciousness is reading the book of life—which is written by God—and depending upon how open we are to intuition; it (Consciousness) decides how and where the story leads as it takes the position of gods will. Hence, the trinity is actualized.

How do you know the one exists? Is it just one? Or many?

You mean No one/Noone/None. None is infinitely infinite, One is infinitely finite: as in a state of constant change. One is every person, every drop of rain, and every thing; like a flower, one dies eventually, but its nature is to form anew. "We" is no one person="We" is None, but we are one in None’s singularity. One-as-many is an illusion; both None and One are singularities. One is energy, None is naught. One is infinite, but ever evolving, None is infinite and is measured by Ones complexity. One and None work in concert. Consciousness is None, Ego is One. There is no one conscious, There are many Ego, but all ones aggregate. There is no one space; there are many atoms. These patterns are forms of One. One=every thing. None=nothingness. The duality of these two infinite beings is not god; them working in concert is gods will. None and One working in concert forms a Third being: harmony. That third is trinity. Trinity in human life is Consciousness (awareness separate from experience, culture, impressions of events, biases, etc.) and Ego (all physical life and all experience) acting in harmony.

This, in any case, explains the existence of things: the duality is necessary for ultimate consciousness to be aware, and we are necessary for experience versus non-experience to exist. Duality must be. Duality must be because duality furthers the intensity of complexity and the nature of infinite infinity, and increases the gap between all forms of existence and not; both infinities must continuously increase, that is their nature.

The duality, embrace the duality: Death, and life, Love, and fear.

We must realize that ultimately we are None and One working in tandem. One is the physical aspect of reality, and None is the metaphysical. Both have aspects to which we—as iterations of the structure of god—are modeled. With this wisdom we must learn more concerning One and None, and discover more aspects of these patterns, displayed in the structure of One, for the patterns and structure are aspects of god; when we learn these aspects, we learn our relationship to god, as well as gods will.

No thing is infinite; things are inherently destructible, always in a state of change. The true infinite nature of material is that it is ever increasing—in the sense that it is unfolding, in the sense that it was originally smaller and its potential is forever blooming. That blooming is the beauty—for it is not only the thing itself that is beauty. Both are necessary for their nature to be fulfilled and beautiful. Physical and nonphysical are in harmony: the act, and the being; they are forever dancing, dying, bearing immeasurable and continuously compounded complexity. This complexity is the beauty of god. Observe, understand, and be in tune with this complexity, and be one with god.

In summation, ego=thing, consciousness=nothing, thing=finite, nothing=infinite, finite=separable, infinite=inseparable. The only reason it’s not apparent that consciousness is one, is the limitation of the physical mind. This truth is the most profound, and thus must be the most difficult to understand or discover.

When I say duality, I mean the duality of creation also. We must be creatively enlightened. Out of consciousness—nothing—we must become, and in that state of constant flowering, like the constant unfolding of the universe, we will become metaphorically one. The only constant to all things is change or death. When we die, we all become liberated from fragmented experience, and become infinite and truly one, for we are all one in N-oneness.

There is no good or evil, they help to measure each other. Both are equal positives in the universe. All is equal positives in measure; even nothing is equal to something. Therefore, there is no need for hell because all is necessary; all forms of experience are an expansion of infinity. That is why evil, sorrow, and all such things exist: to intensify the feelings of love, joy and so on. Ego, out of harmony, cannot accept this truth.

The love that you withhold is the pain that you carry.

Every moment is the first, there is only one moment; this moment is a constant opportunity for change.

What I am, or no; what I is, is a sentimental thing; what I am is a sentimental thing. The world’s unconscious: the god conscious (is a sentimental thing). Ego is every memory and every moment, and they are meaningless, like unknown novelties, without a witness who makes them sentimental. You are only worthy of existence therefore, if you is a sentimental thing to None.

When we begin to focus on both impressions and experiences, we see the world as a far more interesting place. Our impressions are felt in a more fundamental mode of existence than experience. The ego is superficial; it is a basic layer to personality. If we are at that superficial layer, we cannot experience our impressions as we would our perceptions. The deeper we go, the more we are aware of in the moment. When we are in a state of deeper awareness, impressions are felt with the same clarity that one has of their five senses. This clarity is not necessary all the time; one cannot be awake all the time, why would one expect to be vigilantly aware all the time; this is saved for the austere and profound, and the opposite is saved for the hero and the life junky. Both are two opposite sides to the same coin; the ideal is to have seasons of those in your self. Nothing is constant, but we are things for now, so we cannot have complete constancy in any aspect of our lives without it resulting in depression or insanity—for constancy is unnatural for anything. Discover the depths of your personality, but remember to keep all levels in check; love every aspect of your personality; but you must learn to understand them all first.

No thing is new. Nothing is newness.

And every institution is a structure, made arbitrarily by the human mind. These structures are not real, they are constructs; we make them apparent, but we cannot make them truth. Our laws, our language, our technology, and our self-concepts, all made by a collective mind, and no more real than sand castles erected by childish hands. Like their creation they can be dissolved by time, or destroyed by childish feet. Illusions, they are arbitrary illusions.

No matter how devised or contrived they may be, our laws are arbitrary—without merit. We, the people are what make them powerful, strong, and binding. Through our will to recognize them, laws are perceived as sacred and true. That perception of structure is an illusion however, and one which has fooled humanity for centuries. We create sand castles; our laws were dreamt of and put together by hand, not realized or discovered. And further, the laws we serve serve the structure of the government, which is equally arbitrary. My evidence comes from history. No government has been worthy of the human spirit and human possibility. All modern governments thus far, have hindered human potential. It is time to conceive of a new paradigm.

The true way of a government should not be to plague the people with ideals, which cannot be met, or are not within the realm of their acquiescence as a practical matter; the governing body is purposed—ultimately—to cultivate the individual, and to ensure the highest standards in that cultivation, and that individual therefore. However, the idea of public regulation of government, while usurious banks and low wages impede the public spirit, is nonsense. Why are the many men and women, who have been enslaved by debt for decades and oppressed by economic—and otherwise general—ignorance, expected to attempt government regulation, or be seasoned enough to recognize treachery, and act accordingly upon it? People will suffer incredible hardships before standing up to their oppressors, let alone our governments’ supposed mighty authority, without experience, or the great understanding of their actual rights. Because of the propagandist, revolution, or even complete evolution, is out of sensible reach of the people due to contrived customs of toilsome smugness; until the veil of lies and ignorance around us falls, there will be no positive change for our government, or any other.

Freedom, in its most simple form, is the independence from inflexible obligations without valid merit. Freedom does not have to choose from a given selection of structures, which would obligate and otherwise infringe Ones happiness, personhood, or general independence. One cannot have freedom, they either are free, or they are not free—there is no ownership of freedom, for there is no source to it. Freedom cannot be dolled out by any kind of order, and does not have to do with whatever you/ego/I wants. Freedom from the self-concept is the greatest and most fulfilling freedom. Independence from obligations means any kind, even from your self or others, unless One feels the obligation is justified (for instance, I receive benefit from someone; therefore, if one asks, the obligation to give in return is justified). Indeed, if a government dolls out benefits, one must understand the structure in full, of their responding obligations.

If I must take from the world, it is only right that I must give to the world. To give more than taken is the ultimate ideal.

The war on cancer, drugs, guns, ignorance, terror, want; all of them wars on symptoms rather than causes. In the organization of people, as like cells in a body, the resulting organism is like a mentally ill person, or an animal, moving on primitive fears and desires. Now, think of the implications of this when considering the relationships between nations (and states): interactions between the mentally ill are lacking intelligence, wisdom, and common sense. Our wars on symptoms are caused by this collective stupidity. Further, it is propaganda that is the herding force of that sheepish aggregate; due to its primitive desire for security over prosperity it will follow without thought. In fact, thought has been drowned out by public sensitivity, and we have become more like replications of the public mind rather than our independent selves. The cause of this is the focus on interactive results rather than the causal structure. Think of cancer, we try to cut out the cancer, which is a symptom, instead of healing the body—cancer is caused by a variety of factors such as vitamin and immune deficiency. The problem with drugs is that there is a depressing world that we all want to escape from; with guns, there is a terrible world in which it is difficult to make a quality living without illicit means; with ignorance, we live in a controlled world, one which attempts to conform and indoctrinate through strict and authoritative means, and people want to be free; terror is a problem because people have the wrong mindset about security: wanting what they cant have; and want is the sad truth of this world, caused by imposed disorganization.

There are even—these days—those that are terrified by others, and not simply introverted, but literally intimidated by the possibility of interacting with people; this is unnatural, and created, I think, by their environment. How sorrowful. However, if we were to change the environment to allow, and to encourage expression, we would surely see a change from silence and intimidation, to a freedom similar to the singing of birds.

There is a pervasive pattern, a commonality in all people of all places, which has caused the great and overwhelming sorrows of the past generations, and is likely, due to its nature, to continue. The fool sees himself wise; and in this way, the common man does not know his own stupefying paralysis. The act of observation is swiftly lost to the awe of bare experience, which is ever distracting, and pulls the attention of the observer outward, causing superficiality and deep sorrow due to confusion and eventual dysfunction. It is this distraction which causes one to focus their attention on symptomatic results, and self-experience, rather than causes and the structure to any and all events. Wisdom dies in such a world.

When everyone is convinced of their superstitions and traditions, the cure is found, not in the difficult resolution of cause, but in the removal of symptoms. Companies dish out antidepressants so the government doesn’t have to raise standards of living; depression’s cause is legitimate, and caused by a depressing world, change the world and the mind you live in and you dissolve your sorrows.

Self-placation, caused by both propaganda and the misguided, immature perspectives of psychology, have resulted in the overall mental devolution of the public, and the individual. Freedom and selfhood have been directed—by the propagandist—as persona expressions through material consumption. This has lead to the superficiality of the overall personality. Fears have been played on, and pushed into the subconscious of the public mind, resulting in further self obsession.

Entertainment (television primarily) is the means for extreme ego-focus, and the cause of superficiality. The reason for the extreme extent is its close mimicry to actual experience; television—when in participation—is an ego proxy, which our attention is drawn to; when I am watching television, I, and my-thoughts, stop existing for a time, and are replaced by whatever the TV shows. This therefore, is a means of self-escape. Self-escape, or replacement is the cause of sorrow and manifold perversion because self-escape withholds my love for my self. If you cannot love your self, how can you love another?

Perversion (being led astray from a psychological goal) is magnified by the availability of addictions. Addictions are exacerbated by the availability of stimulus. Stimulation is only addicting when one identifies pleasure with it. When one associates self-escape with pleasure, the eventuality is perversion. Some addictions therefore, can be beneficial, but only when one applies them for self-discovery, thus eliminating the shroud of perversion.

What you speak of is what is in your heart. Words have no meaning, and that means curse-words too. When I say darn or damn, they mean the same thing—replacing one word for another doesn’t change the emotion behind it. If I say, “I love the hell out of you.” is it not better than, “I’m gonna beat the heck out of you!” Words are not the important thing, it is what is in your heart that matters. Besides, what I speak about is more important than the words I say. If all I talk about is TV shows and other entertainment—like the amusement park called news and the sensationalism of Washington politics—then my heart is full of meaninglessness, and if all I talk about is my self, then I am selfish at heart, but if I talk about many things, and all of them are in the realm of truth and reality, what would be in my heart?

Academic conversation is like ego-masturbation; the antithesis (ego-intercourse) is creative, or pursues the direction of creativity. Creative conversation relies on past information to form or share new ideas. Masturbation serves no purpose other than to inflate the sense of Iknow, and therefore deflates the inherent sense of inferiority in talentless people. Iknow is an illusion though, limited by the box of convention.

Self-obsession results in a desire for control and security, self-obsession results in the desire for self-continuity. The desire for self-continuity will result in government dominance due to fear, and superficiality in the person without fail, leading to materialism.

Self-obsession is “sin”; we are born into sin, born into selfhood, live in sin and selfhood, even the disciples of Jesus accepted this. We cannot kill self forever, but make it a servant and a darling, through religionhood. Only through religionhood can one renounce sin and take control of self. We are all born into self; this selfhood is not negative, we are all people, that’s not a bad thing, it is in gods image and will that we are made this way.

I see no reason to fear death, I was not alive even before—the time of the beginning of reality—and from that time up to my birth; the rest of eternity is an equal moment in the eyes of god.

Self-expression is necessary, and so is self-indulgence. However, so is self-denial, and self-renunciation; moderation in everything—including moderation—is key. Moderation is the key to spiritual harmony. Self-exploration is a matter of previous enlightenment, letting your self depart in order to see it in its true form and abstract complexity. It’s like looking at the big picture after focusing on the strokes for an eternity; it will astonish, it will bring tears of overwhelming beauty realized, but it will not give a sense of climax or accomplishment, because after a while that beauty is just like the background noise of your five senses, or work which you have watched done.

Trueself-exploration is when one pulls back the microscope of the mind, like removing a mask of experience, to reveal the ethereal presence of the conscious. Self-exploration is the exploration of the world; we all should be so lived, that our experiences encompass the worlds full experience. You are the world; to be isolated limits your love and understanding for yourself. Each of us is a universe unto our selves; to discover the physical universe is to fulfill the mental one.

He who feels he has no inherent talent seeks to achieve success, and compete with others in order to compensate for his perceived absence of practical worth. He is a practical-centric man because he does not know the joy of creation and creativity. His conversation is always within the box, as is his thought. This is the complex which the business profession panders to. There are whole buildings filled with people, intelligent people sitting in cubicles, striving for approval—symbolized by the isolated desk. These people have been lessened in spirit, domesticated for the overall world structure to which they have been bound. What they do not realize is that they are the organization; if they begin to change, the system changes; unfortunately, the self-perceived insecure person is one that follows convention because it suits him, and he desires no change because he is ostensibly happy, but this is because he ignores the selfishness within him, and his failure to achieve true contentment. Enlightenment for this person is impossible depending upon the age: the older, the more they have conformed to the system; the likelihood of their escape from superficiality is the same as a psychopath escaping emotional apathy.

The idea that if you don’t wear this kind of clothes, or like this kind of music, or act this kind of way, you cannot or must not be enlightened, is a form of ego preservation—a kind of selfishness which believes that it is superior, and got that way by acting a certain way, prescribed by a perceived wiser and more noble person or organ than itself. Conformation and indoctrination makes one feel more whole, as though they are no longer a part, but a limb of a great body, however, this is a feeling of the ego, not of consciousness, for consciousness itself is the ultimate singularity. Find this singularity in you and you will be one in others instantly.

The reason that psychological therapy “works” is because it forces a person to self-reflect. Honesty in your self-expression, both to and from, is its own therapy.

When I see you, I see a puppet that I have imagined, and you do the same for me, and when I see myself, I see a fabricated being, a puppet, and you do the same for yourself. In ego focus, we are puppets dangling ignorantly to each other, while our true self resides behind the curtain, holding the strings that we dare not see, lest we forget ourselves and love completely.

*Density Determines Development

In the ideal world, each nation will be a creative organ to the planetary organism. Nations will be directed by the collective statistics and general information of the entire body. Information is necessary for the survival of any organism. All nations structured to geography and purpose. Agriculture and the level of urban development will determine purpose. Nations do not own anything; they cultivate and protect—progress regardless.

There must be a just body, made of One and None, and organized by gods will.

Food, Clothing, Shelter, Information, and Transportation: all Free and Rights.

Every ideal set forth by the American constitution has been deconstructed by the current practicing regime of government (government includes: Federal reserve, News/information, Legislative, Congress, and the Executive branch especially) (e.g. congresses power to create the country’s currency was intended to cultivate independence from private hands). The reason for this failure is currency; our government has been controlled by the interests of the wealthiest people in the world for close to one hundred years. Further, the right to happiness, when money is the foundation to all objects, is impossible for a public primarily drowned in debt. A right is a benifite of citizenship, not something that one has to work for. The right to life is controlled by money therefore, and hence that right is not in practice. Its all about money. Money, and we all know this, is the preventative truth to the lie of all governments promise. The controlling force of the world is commerce, not the interests of the people. This cannot be the way of the new world. Maritime admiralty, banking, the system of debt; money must end for self-interest and usury to die.

If our two most pervasive forms of government are fascism/capitalism and communism, to form a government that unifies the two in a more stable manor would be a small leap. Choice is the idea which would change the paradigm. One has the opportunity, after education—which is separate from the government influence—to choose whether they want to enter public life, or private life. Public life is of high standard, but private life is independent of the obligation vs. benefit relationship of government, and has a possible prosperity not attainable by public life. Also, No decision is ever final; government must sway to the whim of its sovereigns, which everyone is. Jobs and technologies are generated by the corporate entity, controlled by the peoples’ interests, and the appropriation of public needs by the communistic side. Both sides do not meet, and a third branch, one of information, checks both sides. Four separate branches total the government body: Educational, Public, Corporate, and Informational. The other influence of governance is one, which I would not consider a part of government, but which is most important in a societies survival and unification, and that influence is religion. The corporate body is composed of private heads, disseminating from them are the public heads, working under the authority of the government, and whom the privateer has only occupational dictum over. The public works for either private, or public interests. Public interests include agriculture and energy. Ultimately however, the private interests fulfill the public needs and desires, for the production of private companies benefits public consumers. Private ventures can include restaurants and technology. Building, and use of transport will be publicly run; the creation of materials and design will be private, as fitting for the public interest.

The current propaganda prevents happy life through contrived expectations, which exist in conflict of each other. The TV shows people eating delicious looking food, but the next commercial tells me that I’m fat. Both feed off of the other, making one feel either guilt, or disgust.

We treat all animals equally, including the human kind. Subconsciously—or not—we have domesticated all animals including humanity, but I think the degree for the latter is worse. It is just for us to eat animals out of our species as it is just in other animals. Domestication is not just; domestication is an invention, a structure put upon animals turning them into stock. Domestication lowers the brain size in mammals, and the nutrient level. I suggest that the practice of animal enclosure and domestication end eventually, or when the world food supply is sufficiently independent of land animals. This will not end the use of animals for food, but rather, send them into the wild, making them and their meat much more healthy, putting the responsibility of the individual to capture it, making the venture an occasion; it is my belief that the consumption of animals should only be done for celebration. Plus the carcass can then, and should, be used for a variety of purposes—the practice of Native Americans comes to mind here. Further, moderation should be taken where need be: when an animal population dwindles, we should use our intelligence to quickly acute hunting until the animal can flourish again.

Imagine that our planet is a speck in a dish, and there are little flecks so small, that if Earth were a cell, the size of the flecks would be an organelle compared to the size of the cell, and they can destroy the planet. In essence, we have to worry about dust destroying us. If this planet were a cell, it would need to evolve defenses. We either need a magnetic or energy barrier, or a system of lasers or rockets—maybe both—to protect us from these colossal specs of dust. That alone is one thing that the world could invest in, which would benefit the whole world in its production and creation. Unity is needed, in effort, to accomplish this, plus a massive work force. With such a force, we would enter space as never before, and it would be a time of heaven-on-earth.

For public transportation, the train taxi, or buss taxi: a train or buss that drives to a location, pods launch to take individuals to their destination independently, via AI and GPS for free, then the pods return to the buss, wherever it is. Pick up can be ordered off the Internet, from either phone or computer. [Note: this is for the future, and is only conceptual. However, I think this would decrease the need for cars, and increase the efficiency of public transport.]

War is always arbitrary; Defense is always just. I speak not of the words, but of the acts.

History repeats itself only when people use it for leisure, instead of a safeguard against tyranny.

Free information, and lots of it, will be the soul—to our survival and evolution as a planet. Discoveries of sound merit, distributed to all—no secrets—will save us.

Scientists will be “paid” by their discoveries, and funded regardless of perspective—unless found to be murderous or psychopathic.

The problems have been that the public has been informed limitedly, or their information contrived and their opinions controlled. Our governments have always been false prophets, invented by men of past mind. Something entirely new must be formed to take the future into itself.


Sometimes I feel like, if language is a structure and therefore that life is a language, that everything and my perceptions are in a foreign tongue, like my impressions are alien to the words or memories I know. Like everything is ingenuine, or unreal by nature. And as that structure becomes more and more obvious, life becomes more and more unfamiliar. The words lose their meaning, and the structure of life becomes a slow measurement, and the experiences and words lose their importance, but become more interesting in junction.

It is the death of the ego which brings us to god, for only Nobody seeks god. When you are not, god is. When a priest says you are dead in your sin, he means you are lost in your selfishness.

Ego-death is achievable through a proxy ego: an exterior, academic conversation, which must then be tuned out. Thought then, is another exterior conversation that must become a background. Out of this state, there is a complete forgetting of place and time. That forgetfulness is a return.

Ego death is difficult to achieve without outward stimulus to use as a proxy ego. A conversation, television, music; as long as it is not interesting, any stimulus can be used to escape a sense of self. Also, one should close their eyes, as vision is the most distracting of the senses. Then, allow the conversation to flow over you, paying no attention to it; allow your thoughts to come through instead. The conversation is perceived via physical stimulation, and in that way is an objective stimulation. Conversation is a symbol, experience is represented by that symbol; they are synonymous. Thought even sounds more primitive than consciousness or meditation. Thought is an aurora borealis if the conscious was a planet, acting as an overtone to the source. See thought as an aspect of ego, and you will distance yourself from thought; do that and you will achieve ego death. A symptom of ego death is a forgetfulness of presences. One can achieve it in silence, but it takes concentration.

Think of a separation: of experience from the experienced, from ye who experiences. The experienced is a tree in the forest; experience is a sensory memory of that tree, ye who experiences are the ever-present moment. Without the true You, there is no point to any existence. The separation is as great as the stars from the starlight entering my eyes. The conscious is ye who experiences existence, not the experience: it: self. It is like a planet watching its own sky and clouds, or when I die, space watching it’s many planets. That soul is as distant as I am from my television: he who watches is always of a different locus from sensation: the TV is over there, at a distance from my body, my perceptions are over there, at a distance from my consciousness. In that way, TV is a proxy ego.

Life has an infinite possible value; One has infinite possible value, like a seed, forever increasing into destiny.


There is only one moment; its events are infinitely unfolding, increasing at every passing second—meaning that they were somehow compressed before. This moment was never smaller, but less beauty was exposed in the physical form, yet still this flower blooms. I think we tend to see time as the events alone; in this sense, we view objects as a means of measurement to time. But we forget the place of events in time is change. I am the measurement to my own happiness; time is the breadth of that beauty, and that beauty is the measurement of this moment’s grandeur. Somehow compressed, potential beauty was enfolded infinitely from the start of time, and now waits in vain for its fullest blossoming.

The fact that there is a progression to time proves that time is not infinite; you can’t approach infinity. Time is more like a dot, expanding on a plane that is infinite; but that dot may as well not be growing, because the plane that its on is growing too. Stagnant, this explains what we call “now” that moment, ever unfolding; matter changes, but not the moment; the only proof that a past exists is our memories. What did it feel like to be four? Like now. My memories of a past are an illusion, because they take place in the now, the one moment.


Sometimes even just saying, “I love you” gives a certain release,
even when I’m not saying it to someone, as long as it feels like I mean it.

Science does not see beyond the atom interacting with atom, the chemicals interacting with chemicals. The scientist cannot see the impressive existence of himself. Academics will never learn the meaning of life because they don’t feel it; they can only accept its existence as fact. “I think therefore I am.” And yet, thought is a cloud reflecting the impressions of a consciousness. I am therefore I think. The academic mind does not appreciate life in the festive sense therefore—derailed to love by a numb perspective. Life is an unknown, death is a mystery; no, life is a mystery, death is the unknown—in the sense that I will un-know my self in death. Science ignores the ultimate question in pursuance of the distant things, the most superficial things. One must discover from the inside out to discover he is made of nothing, and in that supreme emptiness, he is connected directly to everything that he studies.

Reality is not like a tree, only aspects are. And like any perspective in the universe, you can zoom in or you can zoom out, and the eventuality of what you see is the same, for you will see nothing. There are many exterior forces which bring about the tree of life, all of them are more complex than the tree alone, add them up though, and the structure of it all is magnificent.

God is reality, reality is formed by mathematical equations like my brain is made of neurons, and governed by laws of itself, making limitations, but only ones of sense, like my brains ability to keep separate the sensory stimulus of dreams from wakefulness; reality is not some playground for nonsense to roam.

It is a powerful and honest thing to admit you are suffering, for to suffer is to want complete change where such change is uncommon.


I end with a question and proposition consecutively: If the world’s problems are overbearing, why bear them? We, as children of god, have sacredness about us, and due to that sacredness, have an obligation to free ourselves from the entrapments of all false things. Follow your heart, search for yourself, and see as I have seen: with they eyes of god.

Diuretic

More and more, I feel like everyone else is either insane or retarded. Obsessions with inanity, and avoidance of reality has lead everyone to incredible superficiality. Time seems to only increase the sense of profound realness, and all I can think of is how much better dreams are than real life sometimes. The intensity of sensation is so great, but sometimes its overkill and I dislike it. Dreams are more interesting, but less beautiful compared to wakeful stimulus. With all the obligations of life, no wonder I ponder death. I see the unknown as a beautiful inevitability: a state of deep sleep to the long moment that is life. I only keep myself because there is so much that I still feel I must accomplish for everyone else before I go. The only reason that keeps me alive is everyone else, not because I love them, but because I am so sorry for them, and I feel like they deserve better than themselves. This retarded generation. When I see how shallow they are, it hurts my soul, and to know that they will hate me for the truth I represent; melancholy is only a word, to see these children wallowing aimlessly in their own confusion makes the wide plane of existence seem cruel. This is why I exist, to end their confusion, to end superficiality and the barriers to their enlightenment.